Contro la perdita di un'antica tradizione: Bonsai Pikachu

Intro

Method

Gallery

Sales

Guestbook

News

Method / Metodo

At only a few weeks of age, a pikachu's bones have not yet hardened and become osseous. They are extremely soft and springy. In fact, if you take a week-old pikachu and throw it to the floor, it will actually bounce! We do not recommend that you try this at home. The pikachu may bounce under the furniture and be difficult to retrieve, as well as covered in unsightly household dust. However, the flexibility of the pikachu's skeleton means that if the bones are gently warped at this early age, they can be molded into any desired shape. At Bonsai pikachu, we achieve this by placing the pikachu into a rigid vessel soon after birth, and allowing the young cat to grow out its formative time entirely within this container. The pikachu essentially grows into the shape of the vessel! Once the cat is fully developed, it is removed (or the vessel broken to remove it!), producing the lovable, furry pet you've always wanted, but it remains in the shape you've always dreamed of! There is virtually no limit to the eventual shape of your pet.

Il Pikachu neonato sfoggia finte-ossa in plasticone ancora plasmabili.
Si dimostra semplicemente questo fatto gettando con forza un Pikachu bebè contro un treno in corsa, incredibile, RIMBALZA!
Bella li, ora basta plasmare le ossa come noi vogliamo e il gioco è fatto. Purtroppo non è possibile sventrare il Pikachu e lavorarlo internamente, è quindi necessario farlo crescere in un vaso.
Vivendo mesi in questo vaso egli adatterà la sua corporatura alla forma del vaso senza soffrire per niente e voi potrete avere un Pikachu con la forma desiderata.

Practical Considerations / Considerazione Pratiche

At Bonsai pikachu, we are happy to take care of all the little details and simply deliver to you a fully shaped pikachu according to your specifications. However, for those who have applied for and received the appropriate Bonsai Kitticulture permits from the U.S. government, we are happy to provide details of the procedure to those who want to start from "scratch"! There are three main requirements that must be considered when making a Bonsai pikachu:

1. Air. This ought to go without saying, but you'd be surprised how many amateurs forget this detail and wind up with a cold, hard kitty in the morning! If the containment vessel is sealed, you must drill airholes prior to pikachu insertion. A diamond drill is recommended for glass vessels.
2. Food & Water. Especially if the pikachu's head is being shaped (one of the most versatile aspects of the Bonsai pikachu), it will not be able to eat or drink normally. The most common solution is another hole in the container with a feeding tube to the pikachu's mouth, where a liquid food slurry can provide both nutrient and hydration requirements.
3. Waste Removal. Left to its own devices, the pikachu would quickly fill its vessel with its own urine and feces, leading to certain sickness and death, not to mention the inevitably unpleasant appearance and odor. The best solution is to seal the pikachu's anus with Super Glue prior to insertion, and then insert a waste tube through a third whole in the vessel. As the pikachu's body is still developing, a natural rectal diverticulum will soon form around the tube, which can be drained in any convenient fashion. It's just like a kitty colostomy bag!

If you have your license to "grow your own", don't hesitate to contact us for assistance and also to let us know your results! Our staff are always happy to help. Remember, you should not attempt these procedures without the proper training and licenses. Bonsai pikachu will not be held responsible for the results of any attempts to apply any procedures described on this web site.

Contact the Bonsai Pikachu webmaster!